Well, Its been a while but...

I think I have sufficiently recovered enough to start posting about soccer again. Specifically the Zidane incident. Personally I hate the French and the Italian football teams anyway, but I was really pissed off at the fact that Zidane did what he did, made everyone wait 5 days and then did not even say what exactly the provocation was for him to head butt Matterazi. So in a tribute to the follishness of it all I decided to link to this post from Something Awful that tells the real story of the Zidane Incident in its various forms...You decide!

Just in case any of you are getting skittish

I thought I would remind you who's ass it is Israel is kicking right now. Your Uncle Tim has in his hot little hands the "Al-Qaeda Targeting Guidance - v1.0" document. I already hear you lefties now screaming that Hezbollah or Hisbowlof (soup), or whatever the hell they call themselves, is not the same organization as Al Qaeda but you are wrong. Their stated purpose is exactly the same, to "kill jews and christians where ever they find them". So I am sure you are all chomping at the bit to know what this document says then eh? Well here goes...

"Targets Inside Cities" - Kind of reminds one of the current conflict huh?

"Targets inside cities are considered a sort of military diplomacy. Normally this kind of diplomacy is written with blood and decorated with body parts and the smell of guns"

"Faith Targets"

"Missionaries in Islamic countries, where they try to convert Muslims to Christians such as what happened in Yemen and as what is going on in Iraq as well as what was going on in the land of the two holy mosques (Saudi Arabia) where they were distributing bibles to homes. In this case hunting those people is good and we know who they are."

"Reverends, Priests, Rabbis and any religious personality that attack Islam or Muslims such as an American reverend that cursed the prophet, we hope to God that we will get his neck."

"Human Targets"

We have to target Jews and Christians. We have to let anybody that fights God, his prophets or the believers know that we will be killing them. There should be no limits or geographical borders."

"Advantages of Operations Against Cities"

"To show the meaning of, There is no God but Allah and Mohammed is his messanger. And to achieve the belief in one God."

Gosh, I don't know about you, but that makes it sound a lot like Islam dictates that we all be killed or converted to the glory of Allah, don't you think?

The full document can be found here. I suggest you read the whole thing. Especially those of you who want Israel to stop before the job is done in Lebanon
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Related:

Bullies 101

Hezbollah or Hizbullah?

Ann's Wisdom!

Bullies 101

Hat Tip to Six Meat and to bogieworks for the original. This is so, so true. Please click on the link and read the entire story

Here is just a taste...

When I was in the Navy, I once witnessed a bar fight in downtown Olongapo (Philippines) that still haunts my dreams. The fight was between a big oafish Marine and a rather soft-spoken, medium sized Latino sailor from my ship.

All evening the Marine had been trying to pick a fight with one of us and had finally set his sights on this diminutive shipmate of mine... figuring him for a safe target. When my friend refused to be goaded into a fight the Marine sucker punched him from behind on the side of the head so hard that blood instantly started to pour from this poor man's mutilated ear.

Everyone present was horrified and was prepared to absolutely murder this Marine, but my shipmate quickly turned on him and began to single-handedly back him towards a corner with a series of stinging jabs and upper cuts that gave more than a hint to a youth spent boxing in a small gym in the Bronx.

Hizbullah or Hezbolla?

Osama or Usama, frankly I can't keep up. I am not kidding, I have seen Hezbollah spelled 4 different ways in the media in one day and Bin Laden's name spelled at least 3 different ways since he stuffed his coward arse in a cave sometime after 9/11. So what is up with these silly Arab names and there different spellings? We at Uncle Tim's are determined to find out for you.

Well first off here is the Wikipedia definition that shows all of the spellings. But it does nothing to explain what or why. They are not Homophones for example like where Hizbullah would mean Pond Scum and Hezbollah might mean Diarea Eater. So far all I can tell is that their origins are Arabic for "Party Of God" which in itself is ironic as these people generally have no God...except maybe death.

Ah Ha! Eureka, I've found it! After much toiling and walking through the desert many miles, your faithful servant has found the answer you all seek. According to al-bab.com it is a problem in translating the Arabic words to Roman text . So the answer according to scholar TE Lawrence is they are all right and correct spellings,

"Arabic names," he replied, "won't go into English, exactly, for their consonants are not the same as ours, and their vowels, like ours, vary from district to district."

Well, another problem solved here at the Bargain Basement... However you spell Hezbollah, Hizbullah, Hizbollah or Hezb'Allah though and whether in Greek : Τρομοκράτης, Japanese: テロリスト Russian: Террорист, or Chinese: 恐怖分子 it still means only one thing... Terrorist

Cheers!
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Related - Debbie Schlussel has a great story Here

Who are the Idiots...

...that change lanes on the freeway in dead stop traffic? I live in California, Southern California to be exact and for those of you who share this joy with me it is one of the most congested freeway systems in America. The physics of traffic however are very simple. First, you will never move much faster than the flow of traffic. Whether it be 5mph or 50mph. Second, dead stop traffic is caused by cars stopping dead in the middle of the freeway. Lets wait right there for a moment. It's a "freeway", so why are there cars stopping? Lets eliminate the things out of our control like police and accidents. What we are left with is driver initiated slowing or stopping. What causes this? Yep, you guessed it, people changing lanes. It's simple really, you take 10,000 cars traveling in a straight line of 4 rows. If they all stay in their own lane (excepting intangibles) traffic will flow fairly normally(if slowly). What happens when a car changes lanes is that the car behind it is forced to slow down or stop, which in turn causes a chain reaction not only in your lane, but in the next to the right and left because freeway drivers are a heard mentality. One hears a lion in the brush and starts runnin', everybody follows blindly. Multiply that by 5,000 and it is no wonder why the 405 and other freeways are frequently bumper to bumper at times and in places where there seems to be no other logical explanation. Now onto why the ones who change lanes do what they do and the stupidity/futlity of such an act. Reasons people change lanes vary from wanting to get over to an offramp, to just plain impatience. For this example lets deal with the impatients, because they are the guilty party. You are either late getting somewhere, hate sitting in traffic, or just really believe you can get somewhere faster by changing lanes every 5 seconds in heavy traffic. Either way can I tell you something? STOP IT!!! It just makes everything worse for everyone including you and you absolutely do not get anywhere any quicker! Did you know that it is a fact that you only add 1.5 or so minutes to the time you save driving for every 10 mph faster you travel? Well its true, and if you apply that logic to a situation where nobody is traveling faster than 5mph...IN ANY LANE, it would be stupid and futile to change lanes anyway even if you weren't making everyones life more miserable by doing so. It would be one thing if there were actually a point to your actions, some underlying trick of the freeway that only you knew about that would magically move your car through the cluster F that is rush hour, but there is not and it does not. Truly people, next time you are on any freeway, USA and you find yourself in slow or stopping traffic, stay in your own lane, leave plenty of room between you and the car in front of you and everyone will be happier for it...Especially your Uncle Tim!! Honk Honk

Pledge Protection Bill Passes

The Pledge Protection Act of 2005 (H.R. 2389) passed today by a vote of 260-167 in the house. Denny Hasset urged the Senate to take the same action,

"I am pleased the House was able to pass this legislation and demonstrate to the American people our commitment to uphold the principles on which this country was founded. I urge the Senate to take up this measure", Hassert said.

The pledge protection act became a way for our lawmakers to ensure the religous history of our country would not, scratch that, could not be impuned by an activist federal judge. Todd Akin (R-MO) was the congressman who introduced the bill. There are opponents of the measure who believe wrongly that this is a violation of seperation of powers and of the left's fictitious interpertation of our constitutions establishment clause. They claim it is an attempt by congress to force a pluralistic society into a "one-size-fits-all set of beliefs". Supporters of the bill say that is complete nonsense and have this to say in its defense.

Uncle Tim's says HoooRAH!! and will continue pray for this and other issues to get through congress and the senate in days to come

Weird Website Wednesday

A new feature at Uncle Tim's, hope you all enjoy it!

This webpage lets you do Michael Jackson's Plastic Surgery for him. Fun for the whole family! Just think Mr. Potato Head only with the King Of Slop.

Michael Dragson

Left Attacks Pregnancy Resource Centers

Those wacky liberals are at it again folks. If you ask Uncle Tim, they are still pissed about the sting conducted by Christians that exposed non-fatih based abortion center Planned Parenthood's illegal activity. But alas we must defend ourselves at any rate. The article titled "Pregnancy Centers Mislead Girls" level charges that workers gave operatives from the "House Government Reform Comitee" posing as pregnant 17 year olds false and misleading information about abortion. Those things include telling the girls they stood an increased chance of Breast Cancer, decrease in milk developement and increase chance of Mental Illness resulting from abortion and its effects.

"Twenty of the 23 centers reached by the investigators (87 percent) provided false or misleading information about the health effects of abortion," California Democratic Rep. Henry Waxman said in a statement.

Lets take these one by one first assuming the workers did in fact say those things.

Breast Cancer Risk - It took me about 3 seconds to find this resource on the web which heartily affirms the idea that Breast Cancer can result from an abortion.

Risk of Infertility - Again only a short search to find this resource from The Health Science Report that affirms the claims made to these false patients. In fairness I did find some that said the opposite also but it appeared there was a definite idealogical lean to those particular resources.

Mental Illness - And to round out this little Trifecta yet another very simple search brought me to this sight affirming the increased risk of mental illness and suicide among women post abortion.

So in closing, did these workers abuse the truth, Abosolutely Not, according to many resources I found on the web without any trouble at all. Contrastly however there have been many abuses of trust by Planned Parenthood and the like. Here are just a few:

Planned Parenthood conceals exploitation of underage girls

Mark Crutcher Sting operation in Illinois

Another in Missouri

In truth we do believe in Life and Adoption ardently, but we have no reason to lie and no cause to mislead anyone. Abortion is on its own a well spring of problems that need to be understood by any woman who is contemplating one... and anyway, something about glass houses and throwing stones comes to mind, funny how that works eh?

Middle East Update

John McCain has it exactly right on interview on FOX. See below

Norah O’Donnell: As you know the President is in Russia with the G-8 leaders at this time. On the way there…uh, he spoke on the phone with several Arab leaders. In particular the Lebanese Prime Minister, uh…who asked if the President is going to try and rain in the Israelis.

Tony Snow was asked about that, uh…and he says, “No. The President is not going to make military decisions for Israel.” But let me ask you, should Israel exercise some restraint?

John McCain: sh…wha…should…shouldn’t…shouldn’t the question be, shouldn’t Hezbollah exer…and…Hamas exercise restraint? Their the ones who initiated this. Shouldn’t they be the one’s who say: “Ok we’ll still be launching rockets, we’ll stop killing and capturing Israelis? Uhh… And then we can sit down and have a roadmap for piece.

Wh…why is it that the Israelis are somehow the ones to be [reined] in? Shouldn’t we [rein] in those wh…who initiated these attacks?

Michelle Malkin ha sother leaders comments here

More Absolutely Idiotic Moonbattery

A poster on Democratic Underground, that plethera of truth and knowledge helps us discern that 9/11 Must have been an inside job. Hey man, you can't argue with Science!

Moonbat 9/11 Experiment

(For some reason the direct link does not work so just click onmine and then on the #1 googgle search result)

Friday Funnies - Two Fer

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The Mississippi Preacher

The Mississippi preacher said to his Congregation, “Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate. I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian family.”

No one moved. The preacher continued, “Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression.”

Again all was quiet. Then slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop traffic rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, “Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets.”

The preacher fainted, and the congregation roared.

Moobat Fasting

Michelle Malkin decides to test out the Traitors diet

You Just Gotta Love the Tolerance!!

A New Intolerance

From the people who brought you the "Tolerance Movement" and claim hate speech everytime someone disagrees publicly with their lifestyle, comes a little hate of their own. That's the funny thing about hypocrisy, it never stays hidden for long. Residents in Provinetown, Mass. can attest to that as there has been a rash of tension over some residents "tolerant", peaceful opposition to the Gay Lifestyle. One resident was actually screamed at and called a bigot just for signing a petition that opposed gay marriage. Others have had it worse as this article describes:

According to Police Chief Ted Meyer - Other people who signed the petition -- and subsequently had their names posted on the same website -- said manure has been spread on their properties in recent months, Meyer added.

This is typical unfortunately and never gets reported. That's why I thought it was important to post this piece. Hat Tip to the Boston Globe for having the squirrel food to expose this finally.

digg story

Pointless and Inordinate Violence?

World Leaders Urge Restraint
...That is what Greece and maybe three other countries, Russia, France, Italy and Britan see as Israel conducts measured retaliations to the unfettered violence that has never ceased being inflicted upon them. They (Israel) are a peaceful population that wants little more than to exist in the region without having their children blown to pieces on a weekly basis. Israel has bent over backward to accomodate even the most ludicrous of Palestinian demands in past years and looks to finally have said "Enough is enough!" From kidnappings, to blowing up market squares and eateries, to homicide bombers walking onto crowded buses in the middle of rush hour, the violence has been non-stop. Here are just a few examples:

4 Children & Mother Murdered
Victims of Palestinian Terrorism
Jewish Virtual Library Terrorism Links
Terrorists are Cowards!
Islamic Jihad and Female Bombers
Hamas Terror Attacks
Not Just a River In Egypt
Hezbollah Terrorism
Islamic Jihad
Arafat's Role

Now lets see I think he said Israel should refrain from "Inordinate and Pointless" violence, this is the blindness of the world community personified while Israel has suffered the kind of attacks shown above and they have all been mute. Where is the resolution demanding that Terrorist groups Hamas and Hezbollah cease their slaughtering of innocents? That's right, there isn't one, the only "real" condemnation of any kind at the UN has come from the United States.

Those who would question Israel's actions should remember that this enemy is no different than the one that attacked us on 9/11 . They may purport to be different and attempt to justify their violence through an imaginary cause kept alive by nothing but pure, sickening, hate. (No, not hate like in this country where Good Christian people are fired from their jobs for calling homosexuality a sin , but real true un-adulterated hate that demands an entire people's extinction.) But they are nothing short of stone killers with no regard for the damage they inflict, the lives they destroy, or the wreckage left behind for their own people in the wake of their idiocy. There is no black and white answer to the problems between Israel and Palestine, but make no mistake, there is one side that is offering a peaceful coexistence and another that demands nothing but blood
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Related - Condemnation of Israel Mounts

Israel Bombs Terror Leaders Home in Beruit

Olmert - Israel will Stop when Hezbollah Disarms

SixMeat has a Piece

Malkin Chimes In

Dems New Direction

Wondering what the democrats are thinking (Or what they want you to think)? Well here you go... In one short video they manage to blame Republicans and the Bush Administration for Katrina, Gas Prices, Dead Soldiers, and Global Warming (indirectly). This is nothing new but what is so laughable is the message of hope they send you along with all of that. “Let us turn America around”... BBWWAAA HA HA HA (snort) HA HA HA!!

It isn’t that they think they can do a better job that is the most insulting thing about this video. It is that they have the squirrel food to pretend that they have had no part in the things they site as republican problems and they think we are all too stupid to know any better!! Well, this November tell Nancy Pelosi , Harry Reid, Joe Biden, Rahm Emanuel, and Steny Hoyer that we know the difference between Shiot and Shinola.

Facist Felines

This is possibly the weirdest concept site I've ever seen.

Cat's that look like Hitler

The lesser of two weevils?

World War III Has Begun??

In an article today Michael Goodwin of the New York Daily news says that World War III has started. Unfortunately I cannot really disagree. He sites Iraq, North Korea, Iran and Palestine as signs that this is so. Again, I cannot disagree. However for those of us who grew up in the Reagan era this is not exactly the picture that came to mind when we pondered the next global war. I can only speak for myself, but I always pictured missles flying from east to west and vise versa and it all being over in a day. Thusly we all could be at least a little secure in the idea that nobody wanted to kill the world, and so it went. The terrorist of this world war wears no uniform, sits in no particular state house, has NO regard for human life (even their own). As I say this it sounds cliche even to me, but they are barbarians. The scary part is that with this new army the forces that would undermine a free way of life do not have to fire one missle, declare war, or even act aggressively as a nation. Countries like China, North Korea and Iran can use these thugs as ghost marauders to further their causes. "But they are not even affiliated" you might say. Yes, but they do not have to be. Say you and the homeless guy on anycorner USA both have a problem with your neighbor "Sam". You buy homeless guy a burger one day and comiserate about how much you both dislike Sam. Homeless guy gets fed, he now knows you hate Same too and feeling well fed and strong, one day decides to beat the sense out of Sam on his way home from work. You are squeaky clean, everybody blames the homeless guy and Sam gets put in his place (or so you hope). Its a crude example but this is how things work in our world. The question is how do you combat an enemy that has no conscience and world leaders with no sense of decency or morality? Do you treat them like bullies and smack them around before they smack you around? Well, I would like to say yes but this enemy is less like a bully and a lot more like that psycho special ed. kid who does not have the sense to know when enough is enough. You hit him first and no matter how badly it hurts him he will come back at you until he is out cold or you are. You can't reason with him, because he has no sense of any kind, you can't walk away, and you can't expect him to know when he's beaten and go on about his own business. The only logical thing to do is remove his ability to inflict harm on you or anyone else.

Now, the passive among us might say that is not an option, but consider this point and then decide; If you do not act first, you die and everything about your way of life dies with you. Your ideals, morality, love, and yes even your desire for peace! I'm not sure if enough of us are willing to beat the snot out of a retarded kid, but that would definitely be the lesser of two weevils =o)

Arcane weevil reference

Terrorist Mentality
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Update: 07/11/2006

India Train Bombings... Any questions?

Friday Funnies

He's So Ronrey!

We'll it seems Lil' Kim (Jong Il) couldn't let our independence day go by without crapping his military diaper trying to get attention. You can't blame him I suppose cuz after all he is a very ronrey rittre man who desperately wants sane people to take him seriously. Honestly, to most Americans North Korea is just a news story or a headline and maybe that is part of the problem. After the launch during which the missle everyone was so upset about dropped quicker than Dave Letterman's winky sans Viagra, our President called on the world to respond to Mr. Il in a way that would send a stern message that "the world" would not tolerate his defiance. Meanwhile China and Russia of "Violence and/or sanctions are no solution to the Iran crisis" fame responded immediately by continuing to... you guessed it, tolerate Lil Kim's BS completely and denouncing any attempt to do otherwise.

News sites ran stories like this one and this one and this one. Michelle Malkin even did a little piece on the ronrey rittre man and his country. There are many reasons why we (when I say we I mean everyone) have placated this jackass for so many years. It could be the stranglehold he has on the nation, the threat of one of those missles actually getting to a country someone cares about, the idea that if we remove him there is someone worse and more ronrey waiting to take his place. Who knows? Frankly for all the mess he has caused, a 20 cent piece of lead would do rather nicely in my opinion.

I have compiled a few links for you to puruse at your own pace.

China's Dilema
US Urges Action
CIA World Fact Book - North Korea
North Korean Nukes
Who made this possible?
What Madeliene says
Kim's Hit Single
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Update: Friday July 7th 2006

Bush Rallies Against North Korea
Long Range Missle was Aimed Near Hawaii
North Has Another Missle Ready
China Dropped The Ball
6MB with a Little Humor
North Korean Arcade Classics

Happy 4th of July!!

We here at Uncle Tim's wish you and your family the happiest of days today and remind you to remember our independence and freedom. Freedom is one of our most precious gifts from God and sometimes we take it for granted. But it is important to remember that this gift did not come without a price. Many people lost their lives some 200 years ago and many are losing their lives even today as we celebrate. The ideals that this country were founded on and our continuing ideal of Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness define what is great about our country. The sacrifice we are willing to make when we see people in trouble, the inherent hope we have from birth, the beauty and importance we place on love & family are all reasons why we are a people and a country set apart by God. So today make sure to honor our brave heros and their sacrifice, and take some time today to honor God and the providence that makes your particular celebration possible!! Here are some great 4th of ?July and freedom links for you to enjoy!

What is the 4th to America?

How we celebrate!

For the Kids

More For Kids

A Little History

A Little More History

Support our heros and their families

Gold Star Mothers/Familes

Our Flag!!

Your very own virtual Fireworks show!!